Thursday, September 4, 2008

Fatties Love Me. Like, Totally.

So, I am going to see a band tonight, they have the most awesome name. They're called the Puta Madre Brothers. When translated, it means, the "motherfucking brothers."

They have never played, but I already know they're going to be good, because I know two of the members and they are a little more than talented. They're a Mariachi band with three members, who all play the guitar, sing and stamp their feet for percussion. They all play at least three instruments.

But, before all this, of course I am bored.

How bored?

Well, after the usual 40 minute walk home from work, the cup of green tea with the housemate, and the exercise...I did the pastry thing.
No, I lie, I foraged around in my cupboards to see what I could make first. I had some Callebaut dark chocolate I had to use up before it would fall away to nothingness and be sacrificed to the rancid gods. It's great when friends give you good quality cooking shit as "thank-yous" rather than wine. I've started giving good olive oil, but it really does make me look like I am 40. On top of that, I had a few blood oranges and a bottle of fresh organic cream that I opened yesterday.
Yeah, I am making a tart. It's good to have a cupboard.
Basically, I made a shortcrust pastry, blindbaked it, filled it with dark chocolate ganache and let it set...and while this was all going on, candied the blood oranges and arranged it on top of the tart.
I'm probably going to give away in pieces or to my mother. It is a littel cruel to torture a gluten-intolerant sweet tooth in this house, and my friends will think I am trying to make them fat. And...the others are all hipsters and don't eat anything that can't be snorted up their nostrils.

Nom Nom Nom stuff

For the Candied blood oranges:
2 Blood oranges
brown sugar

Slice one blood orange in 1/2cm thickness, so you see the cross-section, like in primary school diagrams. remove the pips. Lay on a single layer in a baking tray. Take the other blood orange, and juice. Pour over the slices till they are covered. Sprinkle brown sugar over the top and bake in a preheated oven at 120 degrees for 2-3 hours. They're ready when they're dried out, but still sticky.

For the Pastry:
250g plain flour
pinch of salt
1 tsp sugar
150g chilled butter
1 large organic egg

Place the dry ingredients in a food processor. Add the chilled butter, in dices and process till you get the texture of breadcrumbs. Add the egg and process till it all comes together. Chill for 30 minutes. Roll out to 1/2 cm thickness onto a fluted tart pan with a removable bottom. Prick all over with a fork and place a sheet of baking paper over the top and line with pastry weights or rice/beans you are willing to sacrafice. Bake in a 180 degree preheated oven for 20 miuntes. Remove the weights and bake till golden, around 10-15 minutes more.


250g dark chocolate
80ml cream

Melt the dark chocolate in a double boiler and stir in the cream.


After the crust has baked, allow to cool and pour in the ganache. Place in the fridge till it sets and arrange the blood oranges, however the hell you want, over the top. I just made a little circular pyramid in the centre, like a target logo in a bird's eye view, but less weird looking.

Now, walk to the Old Bar on Johnston St, hand over $5, and watch in glee.


Man With A Van said...

I find the link between the Mariachi band and the tart tenuous to say the least, the "bored" segue doesn't suffice. Did you at least take a slice for the band?

Ed said...

Exercise? What's that an excuse for?

bunchesmcginty said...

Van Man- I believe beer is what people give their band friends while they perform. Beer monkey, yes I am.

Ed- exercise is more of a space filler. When there is still more space, you know you have to do something...that isn't taking a nap as everyone I know seems to suggest.

Ed said...

What sort of exercise?

bunchesmcginty said...

Ed- cardio, weights, yoga. How else do you think I keep down all this cheese?

Ed said...

Cardio. Sounds like you are hiding something.Cheese probably. The problem I found with Yoga that it tipped me upside down too much and the cheese fell out.

bunchesmcginty said...

Ed, your immediate responses only make me a-feared of you and your Iphone.

Ed said...

Oh, this was pre iPhone but oh for the accelerometer when you are on your shoulders/head. But now I shall leave you alone and vanish to land where cheese is made of raw milk and chips come with rice and curry sauce. Well tomorrow anyway.